There are things that are supposed to be ours , then they will ours someday. There are things that are not supposed to be ours then then will never be ours, no matter what. Do you believe in that?
Do you believe in something called Kou preng? Old people say if he or she is your kou preng , then you cant never run away from him or her. At the end you still meet.
Until my best friend got married then I didnt realize that how much it means to decide to love someone or not. If your decision succeed then it will change everything. We actually choosing a family to be bound to, not just a person, but a whole family. In stead of being mine, he’s now belong to someone else, to another family… this is the consequence of one ’simple’ decision.
First time I heard about love, I was thirteen. And since that day I wondered what it really is. Many many years later I realized how it feels being in love. I was very well prepared, I knew how to handle it. I had so much confidence. I could predict what was gonna happen. I had the control.
Love fills alot of my time, my day. When there’s love I think about it all the time. When I am in love I am drunk in love and never become fresh. I wake up with love, eat with love and go to sleep with love. I can’t do anything. I become another person. I become weak.
There was a time when I had no one to miss, and no one seemed to miss me. That time I missed someone to miss. That’s was really lonely. But I could achieve many things. I had so much energy to do other things. I gave up my first love to go on with my life. Love made me too weak. I used to be strong before that, I wanted to keep on being strong, to live by myself, and not to rely on someone else. Yes that time I was young and strong, I knew how to make a decision.
Right now.. well I am still the same person, but sth might have changed. I still believe in love, but the way I feel and response might not be the same. Yes, I cant never be the same from time to time. Something must have changed while your experiences has been enriched. I may have become stronger, or may be just more matured.. less naiive.. or it could just be more boring??? it’s hard to say. When you’re young you have so much faith, you believe in black and white. When you’re grown up, you’ve met some ppl in your life and they teach you that life is not really just black and white, it could be gray… may be it’s just gray most of the time.. I mean it’s just sth in between black and white.
Well as long as there’s life there’re still things to be explored, things to learn and love is one of those things. We cant deny that love can bring us hope, motivations… love makes us a family. I used to say love is sth so pure, dont misuse it and dont let love make you broken hearted. Enjoy it while it lasts, let go when it’s gone and be proud of the beautiful feeling you have experienced.